regarding

I’m twenty-five.

Mushy brains and mushier guts.

I have to make jokes to keep talking.

Observation, situation,

I make fun of what I see you might laugh at if I make fun of it.

And sarcasm: my wingman.

I’m twelve again.

Shit for brains.  Guts scared shitless.

I can’t start myself talking.

You’re watching, listening,

laughing at me laughing at what you’ll laugh at.

With Sarcasm, my protector.

I regress in a matter of minutes.

Confident then.  I can’t now.

Because you’re smiling.

You’re looking at me.

You’re not looking at him

and he needs you to look at him…

I just want you.

I’m twelve again.

Deciding what’s wrong is wrong.

Choosing what’s right.

Right now I can’t choose you.

Because he doesn’t have you.

Because I was taught to help the helpless,

those who have less than me.

I can’t because he can’t.

I’m twenty-five.

My brain stops what my heart wants.

My gut tells me to listen.  My hands reach to take.

They all want you but I can’t choose you.

He’s my friend.  He needs you.

But maybe I need you.

Help the helpless,

those who have less.

Neither of us can have you.

Though without you,

no one has less than me.

photo:http://farm1.staticflickr.com/83/214469722_93d2dcf000_b.jpg

Please don't call me jerk

"I am going,you always make fun of me and call me a jerk" He said. turned back and began walking. He looked innocent and cute, nagging.
"I shall never let you go in the first place...I am sorry, din't mean to hurt you", she replied,came running and gave him a hug.
"can I ever leave you,ask urself...? I was kidding" he smiled.
"Can't you stay quite for one moment u jerk..." she whispered as her eyes were close and she has holding him tight, their arms wrapped around.
"I am going.... I hate you... you said you wont call me a jerk again", he started to take his arms off her.
"I shall never let you go...my jerk", she held him tighter.

(Pulkit)
also blogs @
-(Poetic cries)-

From College Canteen Metro to Someplace Else


Part I

There are few things that happens miraculously, some because they are written in our destiny. Till 'yesterday', I only knew, it happens only in books, where the author decides the future of the characters for good or bad fortune. But in our case why it happened hot it happened, only time knows and our destiny.

Prologue

Scene - I

"Why is she sitting here? What does she want?" Pissed off Niva sat on the same bench far far away from me. I said to her, in a low voice, which I believe she couldn't hear," I'll move away after this class"

Scene - II

" Hey you joined in? Great to see you! Come in." "Thanks ", was my reply, not knowing what to expect inside, but I felt comfortable being with her, not even knowing her nicely...



Scene - III



"What?" - SD enquired; I said again, "You coming for the procession?" "No!" I went on to tell something, Niva got irritated and she said, which I didn't hear until I came to know about it later - "Why don't you shut your fucking mouth!!"

True friends

Well my first attempt at writing a story......

But late publishing.....

Once upon a time in the recent past there were two frinds, a boy and a gal...... They were such close frnds..... The gal used to tell everything to the boy and also the vice versa...... Where ever they went and whatever they did both told each other very frankly..... The two frnds were so close that others were very much jealous about the relationship..... Now let's see the seperate characters of the boy and the gal..... The boy was a gem..... He was so genuine and very decent in all matters..... The gal too was good natured..... She loved the guy soooooo much as a frind to the extent tat she couldn't even pass a day without talking to the guy..... The affection she had was also reciprocated by him..... Now enters a third character inside the happy lives of the two friends..... A character tats gonna demolish their friendship..... Thats 'possessiveness'..... Both became very possessive of each other..... The guy didn't show it outside at all but the gal was expressing her possessiveness..... But at a stage the possessiveness lead to a lot of troubles between the two...... They started fighting with each other...... At last their happiness was lost....., the guy who loved the gal very much came to a conclusion that she'll be happier if he left him..... Though he loved her a lot he hid his feelings and started showing anger towards her..... At a stage the fight became so serious tat the two friends parted their ways..... The guy missed the gal very much but was happy to see tat the gal is happy cos of the anger she had on him...... 'Who gives a damn what she thinks abt me.... She is happy thats enough for me' thought the guy......
But he was wrong...... The gal wasnt angry over him at al....., she thought that the guy startrd hating her nd tat he thinks tat he'll be happy if she leaves him..... Keeping this in mind the gal stopped talking with him......
What a friendship right???
The affection between the guy nd the gal isn't love..... It's just friendship.....
True friendship......

It's a work of fiction...... Any relation with reality is purely coincidental nd not intentional.....

It's my first attempt at story writing...,, so forgive of the story was horrible.....

Story inspired by many movies......

I blog at -->> Its Raining outside

I AM SURE...!!!

On a mid summer noon
when i was walking alone
You were the shade of a tree
I am sure...!!!

In the lovely rain
when i was dancing with joy
You were the rythm of my steps
I am sure...!!!

On a winter night, in the snow
When i was folding tight
you were the warmth of life
I am sure...!!!

Its very hard to find you
Searching you, travelled miles
but every evening, i find
you just infront of me

Now i realize, dear friend
you were always there
in my good and bad
just like the shadow of my'self'

Dear Friend, never leave me
To live then alone, I fear
You are my treasure, my joy
you are my happiness, my life..!!!

******many more @ Land Of Dreams******

Love you my friend

You make me smile,
with just a sweet Hi!
you dispel my fears
with a patient ear.

I think of you first
when thigs go wrong,
my words had music,
you made the songs.

Each night and day,
when i say my prayers
i wish all joys for you
without you,what will i do?

No name i ever heard
to call you specially
coz if this is called love,
i know its pure and free.

Limerick..

Hey people..i would like to introduce everyone to a new poetic style called " LIMERICK"

It sure has the syllable essence of a haiku..first cracked by Edward Lear..here are it's some of the basic rules:

1. It is a 5 line poetry
2. The syllable structure is 9-9-6-6-9
3. The first, second and fifth line should rhyme, and the third and fourth lines should have a different rhyme.
4. The first line ends up with a name of a place (strictly followed)
5. Limerick normally have a comedy or humor in it.

Read More here

Here is the limerick which my friend Ram, the person who introduced me to this art, wrote and dedicated it to me :D

I Met a smart rabbit in Madras
With a special aura so wondrous
And with red hot temper
And Very horrifying anger
Still she is royal as a Heiress

NJOY!!!

P.S.Apologies to prats..i wanted you to present it but was so restless to wait too :P...though i will love if you can throw more lights on this issue ( you see i am a bad bad teacher :( )

20 Minutes With An Old Friend!- A blessing!

20 Minutes With An Old Friend!

It was 12:41 when I started talking to Asbah, actually we were messaging .. it was fun. While talking there came a point where she messaged me this;

After 8pm i am usually free. I am in, work on your sentence structure, grammar re read your stories. will help you improve a lot. Guess what i talked to sultan after ages. I am eternally thankful for him to introduce me to you :*

& I replied;

I am too thankful to him. By the way how is he?

And as an answer she replied;

He's doing good mashAllah. A doc now :-)

We both said each other good-bye's after some time (although I hate saying so) but we said and then I opened my message folder in my mobile selected new message option and typed a message to him;

'Oye! zinda ho?'

And there, with in seconds I got his reply;

'Gee! busy lady!'

No doubt he was a busy guy. Though he was a doctor by profession now but still his schedule was up to his neck due to his studies.

'Jhootay! Kahan maray hoay ho?'

Strange na! How I was talking to him, but he never complained and he never minded as we were very frank with each other, at least i was;

'You tell girl.. how you are???'

This was his last message. Last message because I wasn't able to respond him back as my beloved 'neend' was here to take me to my dream land whose gates were wide open for me to hug me .. to hold me tight..

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I woke up around 1:30 p.m, changed my dress and I hurried for breakfast (a cup of tea with bread slices are i think categorized in breakfast no?)

Around 2:40 p.m, I came in my room remembering 'what to do's' list and with absent mind I don't know why I pushed the right-button key and my inbox was opened. The last message was by him and it remind me ' i had to call him' . I checked my balance *phew* I was having some (Kaam chal jayega). I pushed the right-button key and clicked the call option against his name and here goes the bell.

*bbbbbbbbbuuuuuuuuzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

' Hello ' He said in his casual tone.

' Can I speak to Dr. Amir? ' I said in a naughty voice of mine.

' Well well girl you're speaking to Dr.Amir ' He too sounded naughty. It's always been blessing talking to him.

' I am mast .. tum batao? ' I hate the "aap" factor between friends.

' I am fine..' I thought he would now be giving excuses of his "not available" thing, but when he didn't i tried to make him a little embarrass.

' Han tu busy log kahan hain? Khuda jhoot na bulwaye to qasam se you are a dash... ( I prefer using dash instead of abusive language ) Kabhi palat ke naheen poocha k kidher ho ' I took his class.

' Hittler baat to suno! Main yaheen tha I accept ghalti meri hai. I was out of touched ' He used to call me "Hitler" since the day one & I never being one as i love to be known as "Hitler"

' Hitler was my favourite' I said.

' Ya i know you are Hitler to be na' He was making fun of me.. :(

' Aur batao? Sab theek? Kia chal raha hai' I try to use no-formality tone of mine as I feel more comfortable without it.

' Kuch naheen bas aj kal ... kuch khas naheen' He said but all of a sudden i knew "kuch to hai jiski parda dari hai". So I changed my tone and throwed direct questions one after the other, and as I wanted he got confused and finally he answered what I wanted to know. I was happy for him.

He updated me with all he was having in his life and with that I had to drop the call as I was then having low balance :( . We said "good-bye's" and dropped the call. After a minute or two I received a message. I clicked the right-button and read the message with a smile on my face it said;

20 mins wid wud b Hitler. Wow.
Thanks alot man .
And sorry fr my mistake of being out of anything.

I typed;

No need to say thanks. Was fun talking to you man!
Lov ya!

Old friends... =) no matter after how long we talk.. Its good talking to them.No?

-illusiOn!

P.S(Do comment please readers)

P.s.s(Thanks Asbah for introducing spell-tool)

The day when it started and ended.......

I approached her with a card and red rose on my hand.It was Valentine's day.It was the same day four years ago when we met .Since ,then we are friends.I don't know what to say.Things have changed.Is this because of hormonal changes in our body or am I maturing?.I didn't knew what happened to me. She induced changes in my life.Being a talented girl,she accepted my friendship 4 years ago.Am I lucky enough to enrich her friendship? or is it because I have developed a special feeling for her.I don't know whats happening with me.Am I in love with the angel?. The first time when I approached her was a different scenario.I believed that she would slap me ,but she gave me a smile.I couldn't read her reaction.Why would she accept my friendship despite of the fact that she didn't speak to me ever before. Its her pleasant smile that attracted me.The angelic eyes mesmerized me.During these 4 years ,I guess we were just friends.I was much like your other friends,ain't I ?.But ,why did I think the other way . Why did I approach her on 14th Feb 2007?. Did I do that for the just sake of doing it or was there something behind it.You did scold your other friends when they tantalized me.Did it mean something to me?. When I approached you for help ,I guess you never refused.But things changed and the butterfly in me started maturing.Was I in love or was that an affection?.I failed to understand this enigma of life.This trauma made me speechless. Answer me why did it all happen? why did we met ? why did you accept my friendship? why did you smile at me? and why did you turn away my proposal? I approached her with a card and rose on my hand.It was Valentine's day.It was the same day four years ago when we met each other. I wished that she would accept me as a part of her life.Little,I knew that a shock awaited me. Even she wanted to say something to me. "I have to say something to you," she said. "Same here," I said. "you say ," she said. "no you first," I said. "I am getting engaged with some one," she smiled. The mountains started erupting in form of tears. My eyes turned moist of a sudden. I gave a gentle smile.I never knew that it could create such an impact on me. "Congrats," I smiled and I left away.
My eyes were laden with tears when I turned away. I soon left the place for I was not in a state of accepting any more disappointments. Since then I never spoke to any one.None of my comrades came to ask a word or more. I felt lonely. I was immersed in my own thoughts until I met some one in the monsoon season.He was the one who got selected with me in Techmahindra. I confessed everything to him. He felt sorry for whatever happened. He writes stories and my life story created an impact on him that he decided to write few words about it. I don't want any one to read it. Its a feeling that has no bounds. He assured me that everything will be alright. The girl got vanished away from my life.But I would not forget that day. The day when it all started and end. This is for you Ajay.Don't get disheartened mate.Am sure you will find a better girl at TechM.Trust me I am with you as a friend.Since you asked me to write about this I have written it on my group blog.
Don't worry I will bring back your

"Lingering Memories"

I Miss You

When life does get you down,

When your smile becomes a frown,

When you feel life is like a lie,

When a tear is in your eyes,

Just remember, my dear friend,

I am there, for you till the end,

You can come to me, always.

When you want to talk,

I shall be there, to listen to you,

When you want to cry,

My shoulders are there for you,

You mean a lot to me,

You make me laugh, in every misery.

You can come to me, always.

I can’t see you like this,

Without your laughter, your smile,

It pains me a lot, friend.

When you are forlorn, I want to cry,

Side by side, we once did fly.

In the rain, we together ran,

As we held, each others hand.

Now you are not, by my side,

Where did you go and hide?

Not a moment does pass,

That I don’t think of you.

I still remember that smile,

That meant the world to you.

You are loved a lot, you know,

Not just by one, but by many so,

Soon, throw that sadness away.

I miss you a lot, indeed I do,

It is hard to find, a friend like you,

Come back soon, I wait that day.

For anything that you want to say,

You can come to me, always.

Dedicated to two of my best friends... Hoping they come back soon.

Picture courtesy Google.
Cross Posted at: I Rhyme Without Reason 

Don't Forget Me...

Speak to me

Your silence feels
Like a thousand needles
Straight into my heart
Only your words
Make my sorrows depart

Talk with me

Without your words
My heart withers away
Like a leaf blown off a tree
Only your voice
Shall end my misery

Shout at me

Your anger I shall not mind
I perhaps deserve your wrath
Your words I did not heed
Now I am in despair
Your consoling words I need

Even as in life’s struggles
We drift apart
You are always remembered
By this heart

Friend… Please Don’t Forget Me…

A Silhouette

I wrote this one for my dear dear friend Priyanka.(not the one on this blog)

A Silhouette

I saw a silhouette,
A silhouette, so perfect,
With a neat outline,
Looking so fine.

I switched on the lights this time,
Just to find it was you,
It was you but not alone,
Carrying a basket of fresh flowers.

You gave the basket to me,
Told me to look after it, tenderly,
I have taken care, till this day,
As i promised, the flowers would stay.

And now that you plan to leave,
I know the feeling is not so pure,
I know you'll miss me and I'll too,
This one thing will be for sure.

I wont tell you not to go,
But this much i will tell you,
You have taken care of me,
and because of this i care for you!

A rainy day

I saw her leaving the room as i woke up. "I am going to library" the note on my table read. The note was not 'cause she did not want to wake me up but more for the fact that we were not talking to each other since morning.

"Gone to library without books !! whom does she thinks she is fooling?" i smiled to myself
5 minutes later,i too left for the library.. Not to follow her... I knew where she had gone when i saw the cloudy sky. she had gone to our favorite hang out - the tea stall behind the library.The note was for me to join her there.And as expected, there she sat,with a tea cupped between her hands,busy calling her guy.

"They are the best couple in the world" i thought as i sat in front of her and yelled my order to the owner of the stall. He too looked at the drizzle outside and smiled at us.

"Oh! he too knows our schedule!! No wonder tea was ready for me."

By the time we finished 2 silent rounds of tea with hot samosas,(silent as in not talking to each other..We both were busy talking on our mobiles)it had started raining heavily.

We both ended the call at same time and looked at each other.Both smiled mischievously as we stood up.Next we rolled up our jeans and ran to our hostel,splashing each other as we deliberately stepped into each mud pool.The morning fight had been washed away from the memories with the rains.Once within the confines of the hostel,we stood with arms stretched,soaking in the rain,dancing to the tunes of our free will.It was time for another mug of hot tea and warm smiles as we chatted.

In the four years at hostel, rains were always welcomed in this fashion... Not with a fight... I meant the tea, samosa and getting drenched part !! I still get wet in rains but its no longer fun without an enthusiastic company :D


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