क्यों है? (Why so?)

कभी सोचता हूं की यह ऎसा क्यों है?
फिर सोचता हुं की यह मेरे जैसा क्यों है?

(One of the possible translations:)

At times I think why is he the way he is?
Then I think why is he so much like I am?

55 fiction - Amicable!

Tears splashed from her eyes as she went to the counter to collect the final bill. doctors rushed past her,echos of hospital blues dominated her senses.She sat on the floor and looked upwards.None of those present noticed her state.A stray Pup came and licked her feet.

- PULKIT
(ALSO BLOGS @ POETIC CRIES)

Chocolate Tour

When I woke up today morning, I was pleasantly surprised by the weather in Plainsboro, NewJersey! Bright sunshine, just enough chill and excellent weather. My Grand daughter insisted that I take her to the Chocolate Factory at Hershey because she wanted "This-much-Chocolate"(Read it as Hands spread wide apart as a measure of quantity!). I was not particularly keen on going to a Chocolate Factory as the idea did not impress me. However the enthusiasm showed by my little friend was so infectious that I agreed and we rented a Toyota Sienna. We were four adults and 2 kids which forced us to rent a van because with 2 children seats in our Honda sedan , the four of us, adults, did try a lot of jigsaw but could not succeed in devising a seating arrangement for all of us. Mind you, out of this I, my daughter and son are 6 footers! though my wife did more than compensate with her demure physique.
The journey till Philadelphia was uneventful. Once we were nearing the city of Hershey the scenery began to change. I was very happy to see the panoramic view of green meadows on both sides of the road with scattered houses that looked like chocolates. Reaching Hershey we were so hungry that we rushed straight to the food court. With the input of calories we began our tour of the factory and other places. It was indeed an excellent place with very hygienic atmosphere and such a variety of chocolates. I indulged in helping myself to a good quantity ignoring the silent but lethal look on my wife’s face.
By the time we finished the tour and got ready for the return journey, which is a good 130 Mile, I and my grand daughter were so tired that we began to sleep. When my son woke us up on reaching the house it was 8PM and God did we have a good time! I think I enjoyed it more than the little one.

Mahatma Gandhi

Man for All Seasons
Ambitious within reason
Hard with tender Heart
Atrocities, sure he fought
Truth was his Armour
Many loved his glamour
Austerity was his Attire

Gone were worldly desire
Attack He did with words
Non Violence was his sword
Delighted was He with Freedom
Hardly worried about any stardom
Indeed we badly miss him
For Acrostic Only

PAGE 3

Dedicated to the victims of violence

As you just gaze at this word page 3 , I can sought of have a discern into the images running across your mind. Champagnes, hot chiks and beef cakes, the conglomeration of the elite , lost in translation to the euphoric state … Before you could proceed further , I would put a barricade to your thoughts and divert it to a ride of its third kind.

Blood, explosives, swords, machetes, death. These news are always hot spots grabbing attention in our daily lives. This impetuous behavior of people in all walks of life styles has caused detrimental effects on the structure of the society. I guess there is a driving force which is provoking people to perpetrate the heinous and inhumane crimes. This aberrant trait of human being has always remained obscure to my mind.( I really wonder which structure in our brain integrates the oscillations that stimulate violent reactions). Most of us fail to trace this aspect as it s entangled in its own subtleties.

To be concise, violence is a compound which is consolidated from individual elements like fear, hatred ness , jealousy , pride and other gothic faces of human mind. The severity of the committed crimes can once again be scaled to any extent. It largely depends on the situation, and who commits it. These days, juvenile crimes are increasing at an alarming rate, in par with the adults. When I started my journey probing and dissecting the mindsets of the perpetrators, I was awestruck by the impulsive intensity to do so. I started becoming conscious of these aspects, as incidents in retrospect have left their deep vestige in my grey matter.

How would you resonate , when some one you have witnessed severe the head of another, and comes as a flashing news on TV, or if you watch movies with atrocious subject. The effect might be subjected to variance depending on the individuals , but as a person I am was moved tremendously.

Let me quote an incident which shook me….. This was around 2002. An incident that took place in North India. There was a 14 year old boy ( I shall Christine him as Naresh to make my narration feasible). He was supposively from a poor family, and had to support his family tree by monitoring the cattle. One day it so happened , he and his friend were on a stroll, and was munching channa (special type of groundnut). Naresh did offer his friend the groundnuts, but that fellow started demanding more, and naresh retrieved back. By then revenge worm had already found its place in his friends mind. The next day, Naresh had been to an adjacent village to visit his maternal aunt. . Since she had gone out, he was waiting out for her arrival. Mean while Naresh’s friend and a group of boys approached him to accompany them for a game. Innocent Naresh had no hunch about their wicked plan and left for the play. The boys after taking him to a remote place started torturing the boy black and blue . They then dragged him to the sarpach(head of the village)., and accused him of stealing their bicycle. The sarpanch ordered the boys to scoop Naresh’s eyes. On the pretext of his order, the boys carried Naresh like a goat (who had no route to escape). The friend whom, Naresh was reluctant to entertain any more that day(while eating channa), thought it was the right time to exercise his revenge, then took a blunt weapon from his pocket and gouged both eyes of the boy, and threw him to a near by bush. Late in the evening , a passer by saw the boy banished into severe agony, put back the dangling eyeballs in the socket and admitted him to the hospital . After one week he was deployed to a hospital in Hyderbad. The news had then spread like a wild fire. A famous ophthalmologist from Bangalore, One Dr. Sunitha Agarwal(if my recall is spiky), took the initiation , and ordered the hospital in charge to send the boy to Bangalore in a flight.

Immediately she started the treatment . In spite of her over whelming efforts, everything was in vain, as 10 days were too long for the optic nerves to loose connection owing to severe infection. All that she could do was to restore the aesthetics of the face(as the topology was terribly disfigured during the accident). The doctor was beyond shock for the whole incident. So there are several such incidents which has left us dumbfounded, and structures of such incidents happens daily. Making a move further.. To exemplify the mindsets of the criminals, I cant afford to be a criminal my self , all that I can do is empathize them, have a microscopic view at their macroscopic frame, their relationships and so on. As I have stated earlier , crime is shared by all classes of people, and their indulgence in criminal activities is commensurate with their position . The rank might be from a drunkard below poverty line to Saddam , osama.

What ever may be the extent of execution of crimes the ultimate outcome is death.( In philosophy it is said that discussion about death improves the clarity of our lives. But we are aghast about its time and mode of occurrence. The normal human tendency is to hold god responsible for this ). Well , it all depends upon their priorities, philosophies, lifestyles, mind patterns, goals and exposure. For a drunkard , ( I am not castigating him as he is also a human being brought into this world from his mother’s womb. Let me know if there is any other way), his world is the arrack shop, life is alcohol. He would have tailored it to his nerve so much, that the addiction is almost impossible, and this perverse action is propagated in spite of firm opposition from his well wishers. In the course of time, he loses his sanctity, family, job, money and finally his life, and will have to admit his failure in hell. Then moving towards youth… They constitute a lager population of the world. Of course one of the engulfing force of technology. But I think this force is not been channelised to its brimmith extent for the upliftment of humanity. When I observe the so called “ rowdies”, I will be wondering , they being aware that their life is not in their clutches , and also that they cant escape from the long arms of the law, would like to still join the band wagon of their preceders, and bearing the main goal to flourish under the rowdy template. . If you keenly observe the age groups they would be between 18-40 years. Why is that they are draining the youth verve, the precious span of life to prove their existence fruitful on earth. It is just the fact that, they want to highlight the throok and masculinity in them, well aware that they are entering the vicious circle.

Today one group might combat a person in another group. In retaliation , the whole group might be incinerated in prospect. Most of them leave their trails in people of their vicinity due to their terrorizing acts during their reign. If I take a statistics of the people belonging to this domain, majority of them are from lower middle classes to middle class families(I guess this classification exists largely in Indian society, due to blue and white collared distinction. The society looks down upon people working in call centre industry, (imperialistic back office for people who are susceptive to deskill(my perspective). But the fact is McDonald is the first among the fortune 500 companies , out beating the top notch companies like Microsoft, NASA, AT&T, banks like Merrill Lynch, Lehman Brother’s, JP Morgan, McKinsey, HDFC. But I support that Indian’s should orient themselves in jobs that churn their nerves). Though not particularly deprived from education , but still not optimum. Probably this frustration might alienate them from their families and will form a group of zombies. Eventually , these boys start a propaganda for themselves by starting eve teasing, extortion , assault, attempt to murder. Finally they will be landed in prisons for a life time imprisonment for their intimidating acts. These groups are further exploited by the politicians during the elections, the time when these people become proactive. Little do they know hell on earth is their destination.

The movies which are capitalized on rowdism , act as a morale booster , and also enhance their creativity to draw upon new blue prints to perpetrate crime. Many TV soaps are also crime aligned. WWE is another funny show on earth. The term” Underworld” is a larger version of rowdism. Here a network of all dons, celebrities , politicians is delicately knitted and spun round the globe. Most of the bomb blasts , or man made catastrophes of larger order is triggered by these activists The drug menace has gulped scores of people. A still refined view of underworld is terrorism. I always thought terrorism is a pathology that has devastated the fine fabric of human civilization It has gone against the ideals of our culture. This fear has deeply penetrated, that we are afraid to come out of it. Right from Ayodhya, Godhra tragedy, 9/11 attacks, London bombings, terrorism has shown its ugly face. To fight terrorism, we need to restore faith and art of listening. The social and economic dominance , the narcissistic pride of privileged nations, the marginalization of culture has increased its concentration. Recapitulating the various reasons of crime I suspect, the minds are autonomous of the hands which kill. The most important of all these woes is the religious and communal clashes. Why is that people are encumbering religions for their selfish deeds. Infact religion only impregnates love not hatred ness, but its horrendous that it is manipulated against it principles. Communal violence is one of the significant factors contributing to crime. The religious foundations started off by the spiritual leaders like Raja Ram Mohan Roy, who raised his voice against brutal sati, Ramakrishna Mission for a noble cause has made a replica for money making. The above stated facts are well known. Now the part which is incumbent upon me is to provide a solution to the above. The most primary and vital solution is education. Though technical education is a must and pragmatic , value based education should also be highlighted Our children, the future citizens, should be imbibed by our culture and ethical values. But the fact is that only 7% of children in India have access to education. It should reach every one. Because education makes person a personality, and imparts mental fitness for realization of his purpose on earth.(ragging shd be banned). The counseling centers should be more in numbers and the psychologists should be well trained ( There are two branches of psychology, the clinical and industrial psychology. Clinical psychology is further divided into neuro, gero, health, cognitive, counseling, development and research psychology. Industry psychology is further divided into social and educational psychology). Few people who execute crime deliberately should he prosecuted and hanged publicly. This might arrest the crime rate to some extent. We should reap the fruits of the constitution laid by Jawaharlal Nehru and which was made instrumental by Dr.B.R.Ambedkar. The decentralization of the federal structure if India should be made stronger to mobilize the resources .

There is no dearth of resources , the need of the time is its judicious uitilization. But then to unaccountable amount of money is poured on elections in spite of severe stagflation. The decentralization also leads to effective administration , as each minister in his/her jurisdiction will have to administer the issues of people. Though its hard to find probity in present politicians , appreciation should be rendered to those who works largely with interest for community in the presence of detractors. To curb the illegal and unlawful activities in the society , the police system have to be more vigilant and must take stringent measures to punish the criminals. The cops themselves should realize the epitome of the jobs. But to stop blood shed, to save the innocent lives from the jaws of terrorists, a unifying vision should be raised .Its just a matter of self assessment and introspection. If you cant serve others atleast don’t hurt them should be our dictum.( help and serve are used interchangeably , but the fact is that we can only serve others, its just the person above us who can help). It is high time we realize that the fate of our civilization lies in the hands of profound healers who believe in cultural symmetry , social and economic equity, not in the hands of Bush or Blair.
“Hey human beings, it is not easy to be born so. Save yourselves”.
(The reason I chose Page 3 , was because the third page in the news paper which I follow is reserved for violent activities ,and thats what this article revolves around . I have tried to address some of the irregularities in our system, which when rectified can evolve to ideal “INDIA”.)

G.E.N.I.U.S

G.E.N.I.U.S (This is just a sieve hole effort of mine to define the myriad faceted word “Genius”). While I sank in to articulate the concealed meaning of this humongous 6 lettered word, the finer and deeper fragments started ripping apart boggling my psyche. The reason being, to comprehend this is beyond the reach of human beings. Same as the cosmic space has no boundaries, in my perspective, even this word has no bounds. Ok……, suppose , if I start defining its multifarious ramifications, where should I start off from. Hmmmmmm… still meandering. According to me , the GENIUS lies in the minds of creator…..perhaps here again, I need to prioritize according to the hierarchical order.

First is the divine force, for his GENIUS knows no bounds, as he is the architect for innumerable GENIUS , in all spheres of existence. GENIUS lies in his eyes that has evoked vision of knowledge in our inner eyes, and vision of light in our outer “eyes” , that has enabled us to see the aurora of nature. (Knowledge and Light are the two selfish less entities, man can pray for).

GENIUS is embedded in his “ears”, for he who has enabled us to hear the cries of the world, the nature, fellowmen. So, this is applicable to all the particles of our body(without excluding, the minutest or the redundant one like appendix). Ok, you might be thinking what is GENIUS apart from his GENIUS, the macro and the micro manager, i.e god. I believe that the GENIUS of present belongs to the GENIUS of the past, there is one to one mapping. Are you expecting me to start from the evolution, i.e. the Big Bang explosion, comets meteors…..Yeah, the GENIUS lied there also, in the sense, the orderly sequence of reactions which led to the first life on earth, i.e. single celled organism, was GENIUS. (Spare me for amoeba protozoa did not have brains LOL!!!). Then happens the subsequent biological evolution from single to eventually higher order organisms. So GENIUS lied in “evolution”.

Ok, now let me start from the point, that human beings existed, that is our ancestors. The existing world order is a result of constant cascading and layering of GENIUS of the past. May it be invention of fire, wheel, housing, society, culture, and food habits?. My generation explanation will not be complete if I fail to mention the civilization that cropped up (Herald of culture is reflected in us today!!). May it be Egyptian civilization, Mesopotamian civilization, Indus valley, Harappa and Mohenjadaro civilization, and so on….. What I am trying to accentuate here is the point that people during the course of their civilization tried to bring out the best in them. For example, town planning, cultural groups, new strategies in farming. So, the GENIUS lied in “generation and civilization”.

Now flowing down to the technological and medical arena. Starting with realms of physics, which has aid for better understanding of nature (which is once again infinite) to some extent. This dates back to the protagonists in the fields of astrophysics like Galileo, Johannes Kepler, who explained to the world the structure of the universe, the solar system, planets in its complete form. Next in the order is Albert Einstein, for his “Theory of Relativity”. His contribution to the world of physics is beyond explanation . (My list includes all the present Techies, scientists, researchers of all fields).Then is the Mathematical GENIUS like Aryabhatta, Ramanujan , Pythagoras. Lot of research in medical field is under progression, may it be in the field of genetics, cloning(DOLLY), transplantations, pharmaceuticals . All this is to fight the specters of diseases. This includes all the past and present technological acumens like Dalton, Fraunhofer, Faraday, Doppler , Marconi, Sir M.V, C.V.Raman, Homi Jahangir Baba, Charles Babbage, Shakuntala Devi, A.P.J Abdul Kalaam , Kasturi Rangan).

I would like to mention the noble economists, administers of all generations , like Chanakya , Aristotle. Thanks to Mr. Amartya Sen, the recipient of the most coveted title “NOBEL PRIZE”. And our present PM, Mr. Man Mohan Singh. So the GENIUS lies in the “Discoveries , Inventions, Vision”, of these people, who had,(who is), contributed for a better world. Probably if I dwell into Architecture, Music, Literature, Sports, Dramatics I confront several of them in these areas also. Hmmm, Architecture: In architecture I name all the 7 wonders of the world. The rich architecture of St. Marys Basilica church, Venice, is an example. (In fact if you ask me which is richest city in the world, I would tell Rome, not because of its financial status in trade, but for its out standing architectural standings. ).

In India, the Vijayanagara Kingdoms, that is Hampi, Moghul Empires, and several other architectural monuments like Hawa Mahal, Qutub Minar, Gol Gumbaz, Jaipur Palace, still stand as the ICONS of tourists attractions. The GENIUS lies in “ Architecture”. Literature: Where should I put my pointer, to Renaissance, Medival period…. Writers like Giotto, Dante, Boccachio… Yes the literature was at its peak during the middle period . In fact, I would mention the development of languages, which started of as signs, and the took a structure. (Here I find myself privileged to mention the Sanskrit, which is the root language of India, is apparently the only language understood by the computers, for its composure is supposed to be the most scientific one, and this led to our national Language Hindi, my mother tongue Kannada,and other languages). The Romeo Juliet of William Shakespear, Geetanjanli of Rabindranath Tagore, the Das (Kabir , Tulsi, Ram), Meera Bai, Akka Mahadevi ,Ganesha, Kumara Vyasa,Valmiki, Kuvempu, Bendre, and all the writers of this world So the GENIUS lies in the “Characters” of these writers. Arts, Sports , Dramatics: It is immemorial. Who can forget the perennial , ethereal master piece “ Mona Lisa”, of Leonardo Da Vinci ( Did You know that she was the wife of Florentine Banker Zanobi Del Giocondo. It is sad to see, that she is being morphed by present youth). His peer , Micheal Angelo, has also contributed significantly in the field of art. This caters all the best painters in the world ( I am proud to say that my dad is a painter too, though not on international charts). In India, I would wish to mention the works of Raja Ravi verma(in fact I have put few of his paintings in Photo album section), whose live example is the Mysore Palace. All are aware of M.F.Hussain’s paintings( His portrait of Madhuri Dixit was auctioned for Rupees 25 lacs!!!!. I recommend you people to gear up for the forth coming Mysore Dasara, which is a symbol of rich cultural heritage of Karnataka and India, whose magnetic force of attraction attracts ppl of all caste from the nook and corner of the world. Not only Dasara, there are spate of several other events in India of world reputation, like the Kumba Mela which takes place once in every 12 years). The GENIUS lies in the “Life of these paintings”. Sports: This once again is age old, and took different shapes and forms. Right from bull fighing, the martial arts like Kung fu, Judo, (India’s Karate, Klaripattu),to cricket , hockey, chess(which was there from Mahabharatha, that is the Kavade(shat ranj.. not sure), due to which the epic started, and then the Pandavas had to go for Exile…..),to the sensational tennis(Sania is definitely making major strides!!!). GENIUS lies in the spirits of these “sports and personalities”. Dramatics: What started as theatres in previous centuries has metamorphosised , in to the present Holly hood, Kolly Hood, Tolly Hood, Lolly Hood,Bolly Hood(All possible hoods in Wood). I can never forget Charlie Chaplin. GENIUS manifests in the “acting of these actors” Music: GENIUS lies in the “lyrics, compositions of the music director, voice of the aficionado’s (M.S.S, Pt Ravi Shankar, Ustad Bismillah Khan), sounds that emanate from the musical instruments and instruments themselves( My fav instu is flute, becoz, though it is hollow, its sound is scintillating)”. Last but not the least I would like to mention about the fighters of all ages. Darwins theory of survival of fittest will never wane. The struggle for power, freedom, postion,name , fame, possessions has been taking place. I would shower my gratitude, to all the freedom fighters of India , and in the global map, Nelson Mandela. Several moratoriums have been signed like IAEA, NPT, for controlled usage of nuclear energy, in a manner that is useful( No one can forget Naga saki and Hiroshima, in fact the hurricanes , that are shaking the U.S like Katrina , Rita, is the curse of god (Most ppl are under this impression)). So all the peace gurus fall under this category with first one be Mother Theresa( Would you lift a leprosy person),Vivekananda. GENIUS lies in the “ freedom of mankind”. (My brain is locked). Recapping the all GENIUS, I would like to arrive at an end by concluding that GENIUS is “ Imperishable, Ineffable, Unmanifest, Omnipresent, Inconceivable, Immutable at the zenith of its existence”, for this means the definition of god in Bagavd Gita!!!!. And his GENIUS stands for:

G: Greatness

E: Effervescence

N: Natural

I: Ingenuous

U: Ubiquitous

S: Subtle.

(Spare me if I would have missed the rhythmic order, becoz I wrote it late night at 12. There I got , GENIUS lies in the time between birth and death. Getting paranoid with GENIUS, then start counting it. One more thing I am not certain about the dual meaning of GENIUS).

I am your Death

I am no prince that anyone would wed

I knew not life until you came along

You kickstarted my life and then you fled

And I knew not death until you were gone

Who says a guy always needs to be strong?

Even you know girl, what you did was wrong.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned

But what about the guy who feels the same?

Heart's in pieces, the one you once adorned

And there is no one but you left to blame

The memories of you still makes me cry

The tears i shed for you wiped my soul dry.

Now I am out here lurking in the dark

You make merry coz its not gonna last

And when the time comes, you will feel the mark

The sweet smell of cold revenge is my lust

Remember me when you take your last breath

I am coming my love, I am your death.

Abstract

Live the way you want to, know no boundaries, dissect your tempestuous potential and emerge as an indefatigable winner of all times.Smash all the obstacles that come across your path to destination, live with a hope to meet your dreams. Pick along the best , trash the rest. Enrich your experiances each day , each moment.Breathe the freedom , live the life.Life that is boundless.

Flames to Dust...

Moving through the dream in haste I saw myself there…All alone, solitary, forlorn under the shadow of the moon-lit sky…

Those tinkling bells, that flowing pearl-white gown…The beach, the sand, those shells.

With eyes that smiled…With a smile that spoke a bazillion words…

That constant humming of tunes so sweet, so tuneful…And my hands that traced abstract designs in the air…And feet that left distinct marks on the fine sand…My gait so perfect, so calm, so content…

The air thick with everything but blasphemy…The birds circled up there…like they were out there to guard me.The tree’s swayed around murmuring silent prayers…

The cold wind that played with my curls…The warm sand…And the silhouette of ‘the one’ in the proximity…

Everything was so perfect, so enviable, so done to death…

It had to be a dream, apparently it was one.How could it all be so boring?

It all has to be about perpetual bad hair days…About sleep deprived eyes, an awkward smile, achy arms and broken backs…About a body that has a mind of its own…And a mind that is dazed and perplexed!

Its all about printed tee’s and age old jeans…About shoes that have been mended every single time they broke…About sales and grab offers and discounts and fights when hell breaks lose between shopaholics…

About cell phones that are prehistoric...About all calls canceled and received at one’s own behest…About those lies and those half truths…And about punching the keypad late into the night, blushing!

Its about food eaten, food shared, food grabbed off another’s plate…About money saved for a weekend to treat oneself…And about the glee of discovering money tucked in pockets…

Its about talking to people all the time…here, there, everywhere!In the rick, in the bus, in the train…to unknown people.Its about being cold, bitchy, mean, rude, snobbish, slutty on some days…And the on others, just being ‘good’…

Its about socializing, or dying a slow death trying to do so!About socializing, strictly for the ‘free food’…

Its about vows and resolutions and promises…All broken, very conveniently…

Its about mugging things minutes prior to the exam…About scribbling assignments just hours before the important submission…About dingy corners and dusty books in the library…About bunking, blacklists, proxies, and cranky professors…

About flinging black hats on graduation day…

Its about grandparents and aunties and uncles and cousins waiting for the free food at your wedding!About mom finding cute suitors for her daughter…Its about her plans for her grandchildren…

About your plans for your children…starting with their names!!

Its about not knowing what love is, what love feels like…About denials and times when you rationalize…Its about waiting for the right one…being smitten every now and then…

About Juliet…waiting for a Romeo she does not know off!

Its about crossing roads talking on prehistoric cell phones…And baam! Its about not seeing the car.

Its about collapsing right there…

Its about feeling the feel of blood all over, red blood, your blood…

Its about those seconds that tick by…you wish they were years, and not seconds.And, without anymore melodrama, you are dead.

The Juliet is gone, the Romeo was never there.

The mother is left with dreams that’ll die a silent death.

The exam records mean nothing anymore.

The money remains tucked into the pockets forever.

The mind and the body drift apart.

The dream comes true.

The ‘perfect, enviable, done to death life’ commences…

Yes.

Flames to Dust…

Lovers to friends…

Why do all good things come to an end??

Live, Love, Laugh.That’s the least you could do.

Shreya!

The Situation

You know of the situations....when you look up at things...and they are messed up....fully, completely, totally..

and the reason they are so is somehow you...your selfishness..your whims...your needs... your attitude... your wrong decision... your meanness... your childishness... your inconsistencies...

and you know of people whom you have hurt like anything....when you actually never meant to do that..when your nafs controlled you...rather you controlling your nafs...and when you are sorry to the mortals as much as you are sorry to your God....

when you wanna go back in the time..and rub the whole past....the past being long enough to result in such a big mess...when you know nothing NOTHING in the world shall make things right....

when the things you have been hiding..the things which prove how weak and selfish you have been...those things which bear a proof of your wrong doings...those things which shout so loud that you shut your eyes rather than your ears in order to ignore them....the things which bear enough evidence that you no longer deserve to be human...because you have never acted like one before....

when you are sorry...but you know that that its the smallest thing you can do..that your sorry is of no use to anyone..when you wanna go and die..but you know you are weak again...when you wanna hide..but you know you cant run from realities...when everything is crystal clear...but you dont want them so..

when you are sorry..and you cant say or convey so....when you know this is what you ever deserved in exchange of your doings....but still somehow..somehow you want the things to be right..perfect again..

but this time not for your selfishness or your good..but you want them too be good for those people whom you have hurt..and who have suffered because of you..knowingly or unknowingly...when you are ready to compromise everything to see them happy..

And yet you don't find a way...

Have you ever been in such a situation???

Hello

Me joining the territory of the writers lounge.....

Hello

Me joining the territory of the writers lounge.....

Don't know

You tried to figure out,

everything that is mixed should be separated and separated should be made even to smoothen the surface...

got a lot satisfied or not?

never you say
and never you may
say that 'never say never'

but forever you glide on the retrospective sheets
you childish imagination peeps
through the time shadow, shades of the time to come

you always see the past...the light giving you knowledge takes time to travel, from the subject to your eyes...

and its only a matter of time before you will know what mattered was nothing but time only.

Heaven..:)

High in Sky
Holy kingdom of
Heavenly Stars

Eternity in bliss
Everyone's dream
Eden Paradise

Abode of
Angels and fairies
Amidst cosmic space

Visible radiance
Virtuous spirit
Vision of Strength

Ethereal deity
Enlightenment of life
Euphoria of joys

Nirvana from sins
Noble desire
New world waiting..!!!

GOD’S EARLY GIFT

It was the end of February, 1964 in Madras (Now known as Chennai) and the weather was unusually pleasant! In Madras we had only one season, summer, throughout the year and onset of even slightest cool breeze was most welcome. My mother was not feeling well and went to consult our family physician. The doctor broke the news that my mom was pregnant and the baby could be expected around November. This being the fifth one after three sons and a daughter, my mom was a bit shaken. She had a history of Hypertension and Diabetes and was not eager for another child. Having detected, the monthly rituals of check-up and various tests ensued. Despite medications my mom’s Hypertension kept playing hide and seek and was causing worries to the physician. My father had to do the dual role.
Five months rolled by and during August 1964 the problems began to get worse. My mother’s hypertension steadily remained at 160/95 causing tremendous tension to both my Father and the Physician. Remember in 1964 there were hardly any specialty hospitals or any sophisticated diagnostic facilities like today and things were near primitive and we had to go the Government Maternity Hospital, Egmore for Delivering a baby. We had not made any arrangements for the hospital because it was still very early. On 31st August my mom got so delirious that she had convulsions and we were very scared. The Doctor who checked her up said it was eclamsia or something which is better avoided during pregnancy. This added more fear to our already sinking hearts. We rushed her to the Hospital and she was admitted in ICU. After 3 days of excellent dedicated efforts of those Angels (Yes that is how the Doctors appeared to us) could bring down her BP but decided that she cannot go through 3 more months for delivery in this condition. They suggested to my father that it was imperative to terminate pregnancy to save her life and anyway 30 odd weeks old fetus is not much of a baby! He agreed and the Doctors performed the Operation.
It was September 1964 when the Doctors called my Dad and informed him that the operation was successful and my mother was safe. We all cried with pleasure and rushed to see her. She was alright and had got back some colour in her cheeks and was on the path of recovery. We thanked GOD for his mercy in saving her from near disaster. It is then the Staff Nurse asked my dad, “Don’t you like to see the Baby!, Sir ?”. It almost shook my Dad. He said, “Baby? Which Baby? Is the Baby alive!?”. She smiled and said, “Well, you better wear the surgeon’s clothes and follow me”. We were given face masks, body gown sterilized, and led to a room which contained a small fish tank like contraption, called Incubator and showed us the tiny spec of life lying there in all its glory. It was so small in size that we could hardly make out its features. The nurse said, “You know your girl has broken the record for the earliest pre-born fully developed infant”. Our eyes were filled with tears and we were just looking at her.
It took 2 more months for the baby to come out of incubator and only for feeds the mother was allowed to hold her in her hands with Her own mouth covered in a mask, lest she infected the baby. This Early Gift of God is today settled in USA with her two kids who are in their teens and a happy family. Strange Indeed are the ways of GOD. Dedicated to the Pre-Born kids Month of November.

What they say---- What it means-----

Politician: We will eradicate Corruption totally.
Meaning: You will never get what you want anyway!
Boss: You have improved quite a Bit John!
Meaning: Earlier your work was S**T
Lover: I love you from the bottom of my Heart
Meaning: There are quite a Few in the slots above, before you
Husband: Darling you look so beautiful Today!
Meaning: I am working from Home today and want my Peace.
Wife: I really do not know what I would have done without you, my Dear
Meaning: Get ready to pay another Credit Card Bill.
Child: Daddy my teacher said your Papa and Mama are the best Parents!
Meaning: She wants your permission to join the school excursion.
Blogging Colleague: Wow!,You are posting like a Marathon.
Meaning: Dude, Its time you stopped. Enough is Enough.
Written in Lighter Veinfor My Musings. Even I fall for flattery!

Betrayal - Short Story

Brenda waited for Robert at the Airport with pulsating heart.
Earlier in the day they had decided to run away from their home to Sanfrancisco
To begin their lovely life together
Robert had gone to bring the cash by selling the jewels Brenda had brought.
After every minute Brenda kept looking at her wristwatch
Yet, it is the time that passed and she had a Flight to catch.
After 5 or 6 hours it dawned on her, the extent of betrayal
Love has cast on her.
For Acrostic Only

I am yours....in silence

You
Me 
and him.
Between us
the truth remains lost
While you dismiss my emotions...
I can see you craving for his feelings in your eyes
The pain threatens to engulf me... i shake it off just to see you smiling everyday.
My love for you is not so weak that it might falter
Neither my heart can see you cry
Only in silence
you are mine...
Just you
and..
ME!

Reincarnation

One Single Impression Prompt - Reincarnation


I follow Krisna Conciousness (ISKCON)

Every one sings

'Happy Birthday to you
May you have many more'

We sing on birthdays

'Hare Krishna to you
May you have no more births'

But

when i see my little girls playing
i wish to be a little girl too
not any girl mind you....
only if i could be born in my family again..
be my daughter's grand daughter?
that would be perfect!

I do follow Krisna Conciousness
But being that little girl
is very tempting too!

Photo courtesy :Central Asian at Flickr


Shraddha @ The Self Love Project

Laugh, A Limerick

Light on Humour
And to share
Useful outlet
Good impact
Heart taken care
For Acrostic Only