I saw her leaving the room as i woke up. "I am going to library" the note on my table read. The note was not 'cause she did not want to wake me up but more for the fact that we were not talking to each other since morning.
"Gone to library without books !! whom does she thinks she is fooling?" i smiled to myself
5 minutes later,i too left for the library.. Not to follow her... I knew where she had gone when i saw the cloudy sky. she had gone to our favorite hang out - the tea stall behind the library.The note was for me to join her there.And as expected, there she sat,with a tea cupped between her hands,busy calling her guy.
"They are the best couple in the world" i thought as i sat in front of her and yelled my order to the owner of the stall. He too looked at the drizzle outside and smiled at us.
"Oh! he too knows our schedule!! No wonder tea was ready for me."
By the time we finished 2 silent rounds of tea with hot samosas,(silent as in not talking to each other..We both were busy talking on our mobiles)it had started raining heavily.
We both ended the call at same time and looked at each other.Both smiled mischievously as we stood up.Next we rolled up our jeans and ran to our hostel,splashing each other as we deliberately stepped into each mud pool.The morning fight had been washed away from the memories with the rains.Once within the confines of the hostel,we stood with arms stretched,soaking in the rain,dancing to the tunes of our free will.It was time for another mug of hot tea and warm smiles as we chatted.
In the four years at hostel, rains were always welcomed in this fashion... Not with a fight... I meant the tea, samosa and getting drenched part !! I still get wet in rains but its no longer fun without an enthusiastic company :D
word count : 351
It was simple and sweet... :)
ReplyDeleteThe description was nice.. I mean, I could picture the scene and understand the subtleties..
Now tat u have posted stories for the contest.. y dont u write ur trade mark poems on rain...
U do that the best... :)
Cheers..!!
Arjun
Aaah. Friendship! I love the story. This is how true friends really are. No matter how pissed off you are at each other, everything is forgiven. Nice one!
ReplyDelete"Love is blind. Friendship just closes it's eyes."
simple and a nice story to potray friendship
ReplyDeletereally i guess this one was better than the one before ......frndship one
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ReplyDeletethanks Arjun for the read and the comment ... and you are right ! time to write a poem now ... i myself been itching to do that ... someday soon :)
ReplyDeleteenough of exploring my story writing talent ;)
wow..Love,Friendship and Rain all woven superbly well...
ReplyDeleteNice combo of the three,Ain't it....Great Idea and even greater execution...I liked it!
Awww!!! Reminded me of a frnd with whom I would religiously have an icecream an week everytime it rained!
ReplyDeleteit also reminds me of my hostel days few yrs back
ReplyDeletewe used to play in rain .... woww..it was fun ....but i miss those days .....:(
tht was just lovely..
ReplyDeletejust wish that i could go run and play in the rain with all my friends.. and then have garam garam samosa's or pakoda's with coffee.. lovely.. :)
friendship...friendship...friendship...you made me revisit my hostel days and all that rushing back from college to hostel and then to the canteen...gettin drenched was a part of the deal...he he...the contrasting nature of both your posts was what amazed me....the previous one was dark but a lil uncooked...i liked the thought behind that one better...maybe if you just cut down on the description in the first para and bridge the gap between the second and the third...it sure has the potential to be a really strong piece yaar...loved both the posts though...cheers!
ReplyDeleteLovely thought Lover ... loved it immensly !! thanks for the read :) i appreciate each comment !!
ReplyDelete@ Stephan : Glad that ppl cud connect to my post :) thanks again for the comments and the encouraging words .. all the words here make me write more to bore you further ;)
ReplyDeleteHow pretty, Pretty!
ReplyDeleteGood nice cool calm silent one - apart from the splashes you made in the mud ... cool!!
I want to have Samosas now ... its 11:28 in Office ... I have still five and half hours before logout ... wish it would have rained now ...
Write, write - more, more ... Tan will read all you write here ...
matter of fact, I didn't like it. It was a very nice concept totally ruined. see this:
ReplyDeleteSO, SHE WAS GOING to library without books? I SMILED. WHO does she thinks she is fooling?"
5 minutes later, i ALSO left for the library, Not to follow her (i couldnt get this line, because he was actually following her, No?)
THE MINUTE I SAW THE CLOUDS I knew where she had gone. IT HAD TO BE our favorite hang out - the tea stall behind the library. The note was AN IMPLICIT HINT FOR ME to join her there.
AND SHE WAS SITTING THERE, as expected, with a tea cupped (cupped?) between her hands, busy calling her guy.
I have written in caps for you to find mistakes, you need to read and re-read your pieces before posting here :)
This is not to disappoint you, just to help you and I, learn. keep writing :)
Tan Begs to differ with Asbah here:
ReplyDeleteSO, SHE WAS GOING to library without books? I SMILED. WHO does she thinks she is fooling?"
(She was not going to Library - instead to the Tea Shop - that was not 'fooling' - it was a call for the author)
5 minutes later, i ALSO left for the library, Not to follow her
(First of all - the author is a GIRL here ... The author was angry with her friend - so even if she was going to the tea shop, she told to herself that she is not following her - to maintain the anger ;) )
cupped = Holding the tea cup with two hands; probably in her lap
Well, this is what I understood from the prose ... different people might have different ways of understanding - but it depends on the writer to explain how she has written it ...
Thanks for taking out the points - hope we can clear some doubts by discussing on the same ./../.
What say, Pretty??
yeah, hence i added a 'question mark' at the end of the statement. i only changed the 'whom' into 'who' in the next. I got the fooling bit, ironically put..
ReplyDeletedidnt get the following bit though.. lol but nice description! hmm..
cuppedm, I know.. but tea cant be cupped na, she could HOLD A TEA CUP in her hand or her face cupped in her hands but she CAN NOT be with a tea CUPPED in her hands... don't you think?
Hmmmm ... well too much into it now ...
ReplyDeleteBut, with a tea cupped between her hands is actually not rational .. right Asbah ... May be Pretty Me can put a few words here and there and edit the post ...
Anyways, we do not ask how ... so, it can be understood ...
@ Anurag : thanks for liking my efforts :)
ReplyDelete@ Rashi : :)
@ Stepahn : college life is pure fun !!
Ani : even i want it to rain now to enjoy my tea more :)
ReplyDelete@ Sandeep .. thanks so much for reading and then reviewing my writes .. will try to work smtime on my first story again :)
Well come here then.. its raining..n its soon to be snowing also.. and u can enjoy the tea even better :)
ReplyDeleteTo Asbah and Tan :
ReplyDeleteHow to thank you ppl for discussing my mistakes ..a nd so pointing them to me ... i can not explain why i write so asbah coz i am not good at prose writing .. so i admit i am bit weak in grammar ...but will cretainly take care not to error next time :)
@ pretty... rains, samosas and tea.. wow.. just the right combination... being a hostelite myself i could relate to each bit of this post... its so true how friends fight about silly things and end up forgetting everything at the end of the day..
ReplyDeletethe thing i liked best about your post is the innocence with which it has been written... it does seem really genuine and straight from the heart.. sometimes its important to just write without thinking, without editing... a lovely read.. cheers!!
i am glad u cud relate to it.. and also liked it mona :)
ReplyDeleteAni ; is it atill raining there ?? or snowing ??
ReplyDelete