Of Building Bridges

I only have myself to blame. I got so busy pursuing my own charms that I forgot about life. I made promises that I didn’t even try keeping. How can I ask her to promise me happiness again? It doesn’t matter now that I feel sorry for not being there, when she needed me. By what right do tell her that I am in need now?

I couldn’t go on without knowing if he even needed me. Did it matter to him anymore? He didn’t see the world like we saw it before. Maybe he learnt to see through eyes that I didn’t have. I tried to learn until I was tired. God knows I tried.

I feel tired too, of constantly being in pursuit of happiness. Happiness was here all along. Like bright sunshine in the house while I was lost among the woods. I find my way back home to find the sky cloudy, the room empty and my heart quiet and dull. Such is the irony of life.

I didn’t know if he would ever come back. I had to move on. He didn’t say a word when I said goodbye. He wasn’t even angry. I strained my ear to listen to him call out, ready to turn around. He never did. Or maybe the river between us was too wide for me to notice.

I let a lot of water flow before I thought of building the bridge across the river. She even lent me a rope but I didn’t take it. I waited for her to build it while I sat on the island. Now I don’t even know if I’ll find her on the other side.

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I also write @ The world round me

Like in the great stories

"Is this how it was meant to be? All the stars have deserted us, I don't know if the wind is alive yet, and look at you, all covered by those dark clouds".
"Looking harder into the haze will not make it any clearer", said the moon, her best friend.
"But what wrong have we done? Why do we deserve this fate? I don't know if I can do this."
"We cannot weigh right or wrong of what has happened. By right we shouldn't have even be here."
"But we are!"
"Let this tale be about what we did, not what happened to us. Like in the great stories!"
"We don't know what to do. Can there ever be a happy ending now? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad has happened?"
"In every tale there comes a time when darkness seems to be the only way it can end. But are these the stories we remember? The one's that stay with us are those where the clouds pass and sunshine comes back, brighter than ever. It is not because the folks in those stories didn't come face to face with darkness or were any braver than us. They all had chances to turn back and leave the world to its fate. But they just kept going."
"Why?"
"Because they were holding onto to something."
"What are we holding onto? What are we fight for?"
"For all the good that is still left in this world".
"Amen"
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word count #246
Inspired by Lord of the Rings

Written for "Moonlight picture contest"

I also write @ the world round me

We think it is about morality!

Scene V

Read previous scenes here

ME: Good fences make good neighbours remember? Everyone fends for himself. Why do we need borders, the military and the national anthem if it were free for all to plunder?

MIRROR: What is the difference then, between the animals and humans? To each is own. You own whatever land you land on, until you cannot defend it. So you form an army and hail them as martyrs. To what end? Defending humans from humans?

ME: Remember the Mumbai attacks? You have to gaurd yourself in waters where sharks prowl. As much as you may like to believe otherwise, or hope rather, this is not like the world somewhere over the rainbow. Pragmatism is the catchword, not romance.

MIRROR:So its all about survival isn't it? A human life is more precious than that of a hundred red ants. Pragmatism allows you to buy guns while letting many a child sleep hungry at night. Is that what we call security? Guard  your self until you cannot tell the shark from the fishes? 

ME: Ah! And we think that it is about morality.

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More soon

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I'm on your side

Scene IV

Read previous scenes here

DAD: I don't know what to make of the kids. Do I give them advice or do I not. Should I be a friend or a father. 

MOM:They have enough friends and parents must be parents. Would we have done our bit if we don't warn them about mistakes when there is one?

DAD: Do we really know? Do we have that kind of wisdom?  I know the boy has a head on his shoulders. But he returns home only well past midnight, probably drinks once in a while, quit a high flying job to take up something I have no idea what it is. I dont know who he keeps talking to at such late hours in the night on the phone nor what all those hours on the computer mean. Talking to him about saving for a rainy day is like tell him not to live his life. What do I make of all this?

MOM:His sister is no easy puzzle either. She thinks that the kitchen is for illiterates and cleaning is best left for the maids. She has more boys as friends than girls. Ask her to come home at a safe time and I hear all the creative slogans of gender equality. She says her greatest motivation to study is so that her life is not just about getting the meals cooked in time and gossiping about afternoon soaps. I've juggled home with work all my life but I have not a clue how to tell her that no task is menial.

DAD: We may never understand their world but yet can we resign ourselves? We may not define their actions but can we shape their thoughts? We may not have the wisdom to help them win but do we impair them with our fears?

MOM:We have to find a way to stay connected to them. We have to keep telling them, "I'm on your side".

DAD: More importantly, we should be on their side.

MOM:Aren't we?

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Love prejudiced

Scene III

Read previous scenes here

MOM: Savi aunty had sent us this rishta. Kundli bhi mil rahi hai.

ME: Ok.

MOM: She asked me when do you want to come and see the girl. How is day after tomorrow for you?

ME:Do you know how much of an embarassement that is? More so to that girl?

MOM:Now dont use the girl as a ruse. This is a tradition followed since our forefather's time and there is nothing to be embarassing about it. Why are you so close minded about all this?

ME:Really? Call choti, lets ask her how'd she'd feel if you were to tell her someone was coming to 'check her out' and that too infront of everyone!

MOM:Dont be so dismissive about it. Are you saying you dont want to see how the girl looks? Or are you philosophizing on how looks dont matter? We know the girl and the family so it is not like...

ME: Ma, Im supposed to look at the girl once, speak to her for about 5 mins in full public view & decide if I want to spend the rest of my life with her. If thats not chauvanism, what is? 
MOM:Have you met someone? Does love have a name? Is she of our faith & language?

ME:Ma! Does love have a faith and langauge? Anyway, I need not have had this discussion if love did have a name. I couldn't woo, so I guess I have to come to terms with this.

MOM: Ill cross the faith and language bridge if I come to it. But your forgetting that this is about love and not about it being arranged or accidental.

ME: Not accidental Ma, spontaneous. Otherwise how do I know it will work?

MOM:Did the young in our generation not fall in love? No cellphones, no emails and no hangouts even in public places. It didn't matter. Two eyes met and from then on it was a commitment to make it work, not the otherway round. We sought no promise, we needed none. It was plain and simple. I don't deny we have our prejudices son, but you  sure have your own set of warps don't you?

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That picture of happiness

There was a picture in my mind,

I named her happiness

I'm in that picture today,

but I can't find happiness

There is a new picture now,

called happiness

I do not reconginze,

when I see happiness

Because I know her only,

by that picture named happiness

I also write @ the world round me

Whose dream is it anyway?

Part II

Read previous posts here

SIS:I wish I were in your place bro.

ME:No you don't.

SIS:You seem to know what to do, what to say when and what not. I wish I could do  dad and mom as proud.

ME:Sweety, its just bad timing that your graduating now. Don't hold that against yourself.

SIS:Its easy for you to say that. You went to IIT! Your 26 and your a manager already! For me its just bad timing? What am I supposed to do with benchmarks like those. Whatever I do, I always look like a poor little sister.

ME:Come now, you know thats not true. We all have our own dreams. It doesn't matter what others think coz its your own life. Go do what makes you happy, you have that choice. I didn't.

SIS:How do you know what it feels like. You've always been the achiever, the go-getter. Its one thing to dream bro and its another to live in it.

ME: Dad wanted me to be an engineer even before I knew that there were other things that I could do in this world. Ma wouldn't have it anyother way when I didn't want to take that job. Who will marry a struggling poet she asked me. So whose dream is it anyway? 

SIS:But bro, they are all proud of you. I am too!

ME: Sweety, I have no regrets but it doesn't feel like the way you make it sound. Remember what we dreamt of when we were young? Cars, a grand house, travelling, fun. The good life! Remember? And lo, we are still complaining! We all expect things to be handed over to us just like that. Today this tomorrow that.

SIS:But why should it be like this. Can't we survive doing the things we love to do?

ME:[Aside]I wish I could answer that.

ME:[Aloud]We can easily survive, but we would be complaining even if were! Of how difficult it is to live in this world! Its funny you know.

SIS:So you just come to terms with it? Is there no way? For both yin and yan?

ME:There must be!

SIS:Amen to that.

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more soon

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Is rebellion the new tradition?

The opening salvo: Crise D'identité (Read introduction here)

ME: You gave me the wings but you don't want to see me fly my own course?

DAD: You shall fly son, but the skies are full of vultures and hunters prowl the fields below. There is a certain wisdom in the values that our forefathers laid down for us.

ME: We don't understand the wisdom anymore. They are just habits now. Habits that are fading with the wear and tear of the force called time.

DAD:We may not have the wisdom to understand the knowledge that is passed down from generations. But habits are a way of making sure we don't have to suffer again, don't have to re-learn by making the same mistakes. Tradition is that learning passed down the ages.

ME: If I live in conformity to tradition, I live a stranger to my own times. Resisting change until the the world becomes a strange place. Holding on to tradition more as an escape from what is. Isn't it better to live in harmony to the world rather than in conflict?

DAD: All I can say son, is that it may not be right to conform, but is rebellion the new tradition?

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In the works-"Whose dream is it anyway?"

Preview

SIS:I wish I were in your place bro.

ME:No no don't.

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p.s-I do not own this promt. So feel free to join the debate either through comments or through your own posts. If your posting, please use the picture and include Crise D'identité as one of your lables.

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I also write @ the world round me

Crise d'identité

An identity crisis is when an individual loses a sense of personal sameness and historical continuity, said Erik Erikson. We, the facebook generation as they call us, face this conflict everyday. Choices rather. Choice about whom to love and whom to distance, about what to dream and what not to, how to tell the intolerable from what is acceptable. When to change. And why?

Faced with these questions everyday, we search for a constant in this ever changing reality. We fight for some, ignore a few and in most cases we just struggle to comprehend.

Kicking off a series titled 'Crise d'identité' debating some such questions, written in the form of dialogues between a twenty something facebooker ('me') and his family (dad, mom, sister, brother) & friends. It is an attempt to comprehend, not to preach. Do join the debate!

A Writer's Lounge exclusive.

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coming soon: Part I - "Is rebellion the new tradition?"

Preview

Me: You gave me the wings dad, but you want to see me fly my own course?

Dad: You shall fly son. But you have to be aware that skies are full of vultures and hunters prowl the fields below.

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I also write @ the world round me

For Old times sake

As he sat back and watched them go, memories of yore flooded his thoughts and there was a momenatry urge to let a tear roll down. It had been almost 5 years ago when they bid their goodbyes. The moment passed, and he put the tissue down on the table, picked up the pencil and scribbled on the dry parchment.

Lived in one hole, once upon a time

hues of the rainbow, seven

and rabits and birds, hearts of joy

And read about the battle of Troy

They learnt of heros sung unsung,

and dreamt of conquests in woods far flung

Some took the wind, others set sail

To different worlds, no fear to fail

Now and then when paths criss cross,

Shared are tales of battles won and lost

They hug farewell, the warmth no fake

And shout with cheer, "for old time's sake!"

Crossposted@ The world round me

My first post at the WL :)