May 20, 2009

When Will I Have My Soul Back....!


Ages seemed since the time bygone,

Ages seemed since the Tears froze,

Ages seemed since you were gone,

Ages seemed since we ceased to be US!



But my phone seemed the same again,

Your number flashed to evoke the old me again,

The name was the same, the you were the same,

But I wasn’t the same nor were you the same,

The number which always cheered me,

It froze me and it stoned me,

The voice which cheered me ,

was seemed to be mocking me,

I was lost still thinking “Why did you do this”,

without able to ask!



The memories galore across me ,

and they were still teasing me,

A year was gone since u left me,

and it’s been five years since I had known you,

But then you still haven’t left me ,

though I have ceased to exist for you for long,

When I gave you that heart I wanted it to be there forever,

My heart is still there but then you gave the place of my heart to someone,

You snatched the soul and ripped it so that no one else could ever take it,

And I see you giving your heart to someone else without a finch!



The first time I had laid my eyes on you,

You had called them deceiving and bewitching,

I kicked you for the joke which I see it as a reality today,

You made me laugh, you made smile,

You made me strong, you made me a new me,

You instilled in me all that lacked in me,

Today I feel like asking why you made me what I am,

And then I realized you did take the fees for your teachings,

The fees were just too big a price for me and a joke for you,

The fee was my heart, my soul and the inability to ever forget you!



You always bewitched me with the half told lies,

I saw it as your helplessness in love,

Today I know it was your trick to keep me with you,

It was a trick to make me go when you wanted me to go,

I believed in your love as the biggest truth,

My life revolved around you,

I forgot life was anything but you,

And then the time came when u flashed those teeth to say goodbye,

And I still saw it as your helplessness and not as the deceit,

But my life still exists and it does even without you!



I would have believed in your truths and my sacrifice all along,

Had I not been God’s favourite child,

And I realized the truth and the lies,

It hurt me beyond measures,

It hurts me still to see those years as a lie,

I still wonder what you gained,

I still wonder what u gain through the “fake friendship”,

But I still have no answers and no questions,

Just the fact that the devil’s bewitching eyes broke me!



I wanted to move ahead after the deceit,

I m trying and will till my last breath,

But the devil has made a permanent location inside,

I still spread love and I still spread smiles,

But they are unreal and unlike the real me,

I still wanted to give my love and soul to the one, the one who deserves it,

But I fail terribly every time and today I sobbed one last time,

Seeking to know…. “When will I have my soul back?”!





P.S. i have no idea why i wrote this. i wanted to write something on a Teary Wednesday and this is all i could come with. i don't know if its a prose or poem....but i couldn't re read it to make it perfect.


I wish it was fiction....would have been easier to compose it!






13 comments:

  1. dis is really b'ful...!!!..flawless..!!!...vry touching..!!!.I belief realities are more easy to write then fiction b'coz dy are real,dy don't need ny character ,ny story ,ny asumptions..dy r just d way dy r felt..!!

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  2. i wish it was fiction .... it would have easier to read and move on ... now you have held me !!

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  3. apart from the last line, the fourth para was just hard hitting !!

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  4. awsome nabs....i agree with vidisha its flawless for me...whole poem struck deep inside...hats off babes...

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  5. Teary wednesday's would always be difficult on me to come up with a comment....

    And as u have said this isnt fiction...can related many real life incidences with this post....

    Nice way to vent it out...
    It was good... and i hope and wish that u get yr soul back...

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  6. @Vidisha thanks ...i just jotted down whatever i felt appropriate...glad the end result was good :)

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  7. @Prats i m glad u liked it :)
    Well the fourth para was hardest to jot and i loved it the most too :)

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  8. @Tweets so sweet of u to consider it flawless....but i was unsure if it even qualifies to be a poem...i jotted it and i was like does it even make sense...glad it did :)

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  9. @The Vitruvian Boy.....my post is blessed that u too actually commented i couldn't be more glad ...real life makes the most heart rendering posts ...i too wish i can gain that lost soul someday :)

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  10. Wow ... I mean Wow *bows* it was absolutely touching and so so real. As someone in the comments mentioned that it can relate to so many incedences, I agree it can, in fact it does. It was too real to be fiction. It was brilliant ... *thumbs up* :)

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  11. @Kajal i knew it somehow u will see that ...Hugs back !

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  12. @Frozen thanks so much for the appreciation! I too so wish it was a fiction than a reality...maybe then it wd have been easily to compose and re-read it!

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