July 9, 2011

Long distance love..

     "Long distance relations just don't work." They tried knocking some reason into me.
     "You won't be able to hold on for long." 
     "Out of sight, out of mind." They bombarded us with innumerable examples.. 

We were watching Love Aaj Kal.. Me and my friends.. The early sequence where Deepika and Saif discuss the problems of long distance relation is running on the screen..

They say its all over the phone.. Then there is insecurity.. There comes a stage when all one does is fight and on and on and on.. 

I feel three pairs of eyes on me in the dark theatre.. I know what's going on their mind..
"Exactly.. Look look.. It always goes down the same line.." their eyes say it all..

I stir uncomfortably in my chair and shrug it off..  I marvel at the boldness of Deepika's character and frown at the immaturity of Saif.. In the end when both of them unite I give my friends the-evil-victorious grin!  

Ok, its just a movie but its the reality of many relations. Long distance relation thrives on communication, trust and the most important PATIENCE..

It's been 4 years and still I haven't had enough of the last requirement. We frown, we argue and fight.. But we also smile, trust, support, tease, laugh and love...

I never understand why people would want to break up just because they are moving for further studies or work.. In today's times holding on to each other isn't so difficult thanks to the wonderful things called THE MOBILE PHONES, SKYPE, COURIER SERVICES etc etc..

The golden word is PATIENCE
Unless you have enough of it don't venture into a long distance relationship.. If you love someone then don't underestimate the power of it.. The thought of losing love will give you the patience.. 

If you feel long distance is a good option as it gives you security of a stable relation as also the freedom to fling then think back.. If you can't hold yourself from getting attracted to someone else then simply accept that YOU ARE NOT REALLY IN LOVE WITH THE PERSON AWAY FROM YOU.. The day you realise it then it is only fair that you move out of the relation than cheat..

Ofcourse, long distance relation is not all rosy.. 
There are times when you wish you too had your special someone sharing the umbrella with you on a rainy day..
Times when you will envy your friends being pampered by their lovers on Valentine's day..
Times when you will be depressed you cannot celebrate your birthday with your love..
Times you will have to head back home not wishing to be kabaab me haddi when your friends plan to go out in pairs..
Times when you won't be able to fit in with your single friends nor the committed ones!
Times you will curse your luck...
Times you will feel your love is jinxed..

If you plan to stick to your partner and have a long term vision of your future then think about the endless mornings you will wake up next to your partner..
The countless nights you will cuddle up with your partner..
The many birthdays, valentine's and rainy days you will see together..
Doesn't a few years of Patience look too less a price for that??

I certainly won't be the one encouraging people to get into long distance relationship for the greater gains..its easier said than done I know.. You may be drawn to the ends of your wits.. :)

The whole point of writing this post and jotting down the good and bad side is that long distance is a feasible option and worth considering before throwing out the love that could endure and still be strong.. 
Physical closeness matters I agree.. But who ever said that having your love close to you would ensure a smooth love life?? 

By the way its been 3 years since Love Aaj Kal and as I was about to write this last line I get a call and that voice on the other end which makes me blush without reason asks me
"Do you still have fever ? Have your eyes stopped hurting ( I woke up with a boil on lower side of the eye  ) ?

No distance is ever too long for two hearts that want to be together... 
My Photo


  1. Tell me about it! People simply give excuse of long distance doesn't work if they don't wanna put a little extra effort to make it work. Obviously people using such excuse are never in Love with you and can never be! An amazing post :)

  2. There is an old saying : "If It’s Important, You’ll Find A Way. If It Isn’t, You’ll Find An Excuse." So people using excuse of "long distance doesn't work" are the ones who are not ready to put a little effort to make it work and not in love with you and can never be. An amazing post!

  3. So trueeeeeeeeee...
    Distance can separate by distance but never from the heart..
    I was actually planning to write on the same subject...I just came across a quote few days back:-
    "Distance doesn't ruin relationships,Doubts do".
    I was planning to write something similar that if you are committed to someone,you won't ever end up breaking up...!! :)

    Awesome post!! <3

  4. Its true...Patience is the word...and at times when we are worried it makes the heart miserable...

    Nice one :)

    Take Care.

  5. Very very true. :(

    Once, there's a guy and we almost wanted to start on a relationship when he just suddenly said he had to go to Australia. He cut off all the contacts, changed email, changed number, deleted me from Facebook and everything. He even told me to go after my best friend instead because he'll be staying. I was so broken.
    And after a year of no contact, i heard from someone that he's no longer moving, something happened in the family. And gosh! That got my hopes up again..
    Until I got over the excitement that he's not moving, I came to realize that maybe I don't mean anything much to him.
    If he really felt anything for me at all, he wouldn't have cut off everything, disappeared and refused contact without giving me a reason. We would never have worked out anyways. :)

    And heyy, I wanted to share this video with you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtBk6Y5b-Nc&feature=relmfu
    This is the kind of long distance I would want to have. <3

  6. haaye!!! i do not know what else to add.... you know my life lol... 5 years and counting :P

  7. @Droopy Rose : very well quoted! A little more effort is what is needed to make a relation last.. Unfortunately everyone wants it the easy way!

    @Where thoughts are word$ : Thank you :) I just loved the quote "Distances dont ruin relations, doubts do" ..

    @Fatima: Thank you.. I recently read somewhere, "If someone loves us they worry for us and by avoiding their worry we deny their love.." I won't sound all saintly and say that one can stay away from doubts or worry, but knowing where to draw a line is what is needed.. worry shouldn't destroy the relation for which we worry.. :)

  8. @Freelancer: yeah I know your life and who could understand better?? :)
    Well 5 years and counting and how great is that! Shows that relations do last if you want it to :)
    You lead me in this too :) mine is 4 years and counting :)

  9. @Nic
    Sorry for replying late to your comment..
    Firstly I wanted to write the reply exclusively to you and secondly I took time watching the video you shared first :)

    Big hugs to you dear.. It was very insensitive of the guy to suggest his best friend because he is available! Also I m glad you could see through the fact that he really wasn't intent on carrying with you else he could have pulled through.. Well it is better than being in such relation and getting cheated and for that you have to thank your stars!

    P.S I totally connected to the video coz I have had some self photo clicking moments myself :)Why long distance! I pray you get the perfect one close to you :)


  10. Maithili,

    :) Am glad that you liked the video..
    And yea, I suppose it's a blessing in disguise? We're on our separate paths, not crossing over again. And my best friend, the one who stayed when he left, we're good now.. :D

  11. hey im in a long distance too and we've been together for almost two years. "distance is so little when you truly love someone".

    visit mine honelovesandrew.blogspot.com thanks! godbless!


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