April 27, 2009


He walks to me in the night
night with the starry skies
skies beautifully dark
dark like his romantic eyes

Eyes i close to see his presence
presence in my dream land
land of smiles, he turns it to be
be there, i wish forever, holding his hand

Hand to hold, to him i move
move to meet him in the tender light
light of the burning candles suddenly fade
fade away my hope for the night...!!!


  1. first verse... perfect.

    second verse... its good, but if 1 small edit is made, i feel it will be better.

    third verse... lacks flow to me, can very much be bettered.

    *dont scold me yaar, i've been at ur throat looking for perfection i guess!* :)

  2. @Leo

    thanks yaar...will take care of the changes the next time...!!!

    and scolding?? never...i take your words...u help me do better all the time...so no scolding frm my side...!!!

    i am ready to take every comment from you...i see it making me better the next time..!!!

  3. vinay did my job already :) but i must say, i loved the ending thoughts !! really perfect :)

  4. the 1st stanza is super...so too the last two lines...the ending of the reverie as hope ends!!!

  5. The painting complements the poem pretty well and I liked it because you carry a hope in it which fades towards the end. The end was destined to be yet the hope makes it worth dreaming.

  6. @Pretty me

    thanks yaar...will defly try n do it better the next time..!!!

  7. nice work...i also agree wid vin... though, i liked the ending a lot.....!

    good work....kp rytn...!

  8. jeez ..Love the start i.e the first para....and the end too....

    Liked the way you took the last words and made it the first for each line :)

  9. this left me sighing.. :D

  10. @Anurag

    thanks friend...this form of poetry is called Lop poetry..!!!

  11. @the pink orchid

    haha...why are you sighing my dear???

  12. yamini i would reply for kan...it left me sighing tooo...i wouldn't comment on the style of poetry as the masters have already done but the ending was just too deep n touching...it touched my heart straight...


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