January 26, 2009

Victory and Bliss.

When even the eloquent silence wept,
Lachrymal,
The sheer pain, the gore,
And sand pierced in the tear-less eyes
Arid and desolate.
Nothing promising much,
But the tears were confined in the fake smiles,
Testing the acme of resistance,
Not letting even a single one to flow.

The stupendously-fantabulous patience was lauded
And appraised by the heavens above,
Gigantic canvas of life
Which had been ashen-brown
Was dappled with the glimmering hues
Unrelenting irrevocable days trod away
Darting pass the iridescent moments
Juvenile spirits were woven again
Coaxed someone back to life
And a mirthful countenance glared back.
Someone was privileged enough to be victorious
Over the inundated misery
And that someone,
Lived her life
With victory and bliss.



Word count: 119.

This is one of my favorite poems. Really favorite, I have gotten this one published twice, once in Young Time – Khaleej Times and other in US – The News. Again, related to waiting and watching till the dawn arrives, all of these poems are written in 2005 and early 2006, the time I thought I had become the poetic muse personified; I used to speak in rhymes, reply in jingles and talk in verses. But that was once upon a time. (All of these master pieces are once written years ago)

Since any type of rant is un-allowed here I decided to take this note as an excuse to what I want to say. I will not be taking part in the contest (this decision is flexible though :P ) just because I find it unable to write poems now, been trying for last one week but futile, nothing worthwhile was produced. And honestly I was/am still confused about the theme, I want more poems to be posted here to have a clear view of it, may be I will actually come up with a nice idea/inspiration etc.
I want you all to evaluate it separately from the contest and thoroughly.

For ease of all =)
Eloquent silence: sometimes even the silence is expressive, and I have experienced times when silence weeps, referring it here.
Lachrymal: it’s a dull shade used to portray sadness/grief
Acme: heights, here used as with-all-might.
Although the phrase 'stupendously-fantabulous' is incorrect grammatically and literally but I really like it there, because patience can be stupendous, it can also be fantabulous.
Dappled – irregular splashes of color over something
Juvenile – young/blithesome (youth is generally bliss)
Coaxed – persuaded
Mirthful – happy!!
Countenance – expression
Inundated (literally means busy, here taken as flood of)


I hope you all like the poem.

Wishes,
Asbah.

13 comments:

  1. liked it, loved it and bowled over by it....

    waiting to see your contest entry..I know you will do wonders..

    god bless!!

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  2. oh Lord! Thankyou..

    comming from you, it sure is compliment :) Gratis.

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  3. asbah, are u sure its not ur entry? coz that blew me away..! :)

    the depth and the emotion, it could be felt!

    waitin to see ur entry...like calliope says, it will do wonders!

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  4. oh hold on, i USED to write poems, really, its been so long the muse has abandoned me and never returned! i cant participate :(

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  5. ohh wow....now now..i had to read dis also twice :P
    n saw ur scraps..didnt undrstnd that ease for all...now i see...hehe...gud gud..thanks ;)
    oh..d depth of ur poems...enuf to drown me!! :D
    n i love dat...

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  6. lol..


    *tries to save pri from drowning*

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  7. i'm really impressed by this poem

    i wonder how much more beautiful ur actual contest entry will be

    read every line...so much depth in it!

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  8. One of my favourites till date....
    and the depth... I too am drowning... ;)

    no more words asbah... Just top notch...

    Try writing a poem until 4th.. If u still cant then fine... "I can't participate" is for now, a premature statement....
    We don't wanna hear that from the 'bests' like u.. :)

    Cheers..!!
    Arjun

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  9. Waoh what emotion there Asbah ....

    I could understand this one fully too :) yaay :P

    Wonderful Work :)

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  10. just perfect !! this can be anyone's favorite !! such imagery and words :)

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  11. Asbo,

    I know what you mean by lack of inspiration.. Why not write on that?

    I was so down on inspiration that I couldnt even get myself to read and comment on posts. Then i saw an inspiring post about Indian Republic Day. And then that struck me. and I wrote.

    You just need something to spark you up... Find it fast!

    Now, about this poem...Absolutely loved it. I had promised myself it would be the first thing I read when I came back and thats what I did! It took some time to understand and assimilate everything but as I did.. It rose within me! Babe..Come back quick..Let work not sap your creativity!

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