January 14, 2009

A Promise Kept

Hey There People!!
:)
The story Below is my Entry to the Ascension Short Story Contest taking place at Clarity of Night.
Would Love to have your Feedback on it
:)
A Promise Kept
  I rushed to the ICU ward of the Hospital as fast as my legs could carry me. It was almost daybreak. Twenty minutes ago, I had received the doctor’s call, confirming that the time had now come. That which I had been dreading; that which I had hoped would never happen; had now come to pass.
Like the dog afraid of his own shadow, I ran towards her.
    The ward came to view. Like a pale ghost, I slowed down to a standstill. The door was ajar. She was looking right at me.
    She seemed to be looking right through me, as though she knew of every thought and emotion tormenting my mind. She had that smile on her face; that carefree smile that even months of chemotherapy had failed to wipe out. Her smile seemed to be telling me something.
But I just couldn’t place it.
     The doctor came out just then. With an apologetic voice, he said “I’m so sorry, son. She succumbed just a few minutes ago. A brave fighter. God rest her soul.”
He walked away.
Terror tore at me and my insides seemed to shrivel up.
“That means . . . . . her eyes . . . . . Oh God!”
She knew I’d come. She kept waiting for me till the very end. Tears leaked out of my eyes. But I held strong. I kept her promise.  I never cried.
And I realized that she knew it.
 Her smile told me that.

P.S. :As of now, it hasn't been published in Clarity of Night yet, But i've been told that it will be The Entry No. 86
:)

16 comments:

  1. oooh! Nice! 6 of us now :)

    As I am excited now, this story is struck a chord with me bcas its personal. This actually my personal experience :( Unfortunately, the person I lost was my mom...

    But now I am hoping one of us wins! Yippppeee!

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  2. I just realised I think I sound bipolar in that comment!!!

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  3. And its posted its posted!!!

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  5. Nice Mann Really Nice...
    Any Personal Experinces for you or a complete fiction ?? :P

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  6. gruelling.. painful.. touching..

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  7. I am sorry to hear of your mother, Rashi.

    Well, this was a story from personal experience.
    Thanks for reading
    And for liking it
    :)

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  8. It doesn't matter, Rashi
    :)
    Bipolarity shows you're stable
    :)
    :D

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  9. Thank you, anurag,

    Yes, it was from personal experience.
    Thanks for reading And for liking it
    :)

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  10. At pink orchid
    :)
    Thank you for reading.
    :)

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  11. Thanks pretty me
    :)
    Glad you liked it :)
    :)

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