August 13, 2010

If UDAAN was made by Karan Johar.



If Udaan was made by Karan Johar :

#1 The name wouldnt have been 'Udaan' for starters..maybe something starting with K.
How about k-UDAA-daN? Because thats where your movies belong..! BURN..!!!

#2 And Ronit Roy wouldnt have been living in some tinpot house in Jamshedpur..It would have been London or Miami..
And that tinpot Premier Padmini car he drives would have been replaced by some helicopter landing on the helipads of the building.

#3 The protoganist in the movie aka. Rohan wouldnt have to work at some steel factory..Instead he would have been forced to take over a "Baddi Jaydaat" of his father.

#4 Just for an added effect he would have casted Kareena Kapoor as "Poo" as Rohans Love interest.

#5 The background score would have been "Pitra devo bhavam - Acharya devo bhavam" ( Remember K3G?? "Tvame va maata cha pitta tvamevam..? )

#6 Kajol would be in a guest appearing role..Or is that Rani..? Or Preity..?
Karan Johar has the hots for oldies..!

#7 Too many "Sexy Sam" kinda songs..that later becomes a tortune in your head..

# 8 Rohan would discover his mom ( like Rakhee in Karan-Arjun cameo) lying somewhere and discovering the fact that his psycho Dad abandoned her and sent her on an exile..and now She waits all alone in a fit of mercy for the Psycho Dad to take her back. And yes she does all the Karva-Chout ka vrat promptly..! Phew..!

# 9 The "Sautela cute bhai" is all naughty with hi-fi attitude and you wonder "What a fucking spoilt brat"..

# 10 The climax would have been different with families reuniting and Psycho Dad suddenly realising his "mistake" and running towards his son with an Irritating Background score of "Pittro devo bhavam.."

# 11 One John Abraham type guy with his semi nude butt in your face..and all the country's girls going "Woooow" at that chiseled deriere.

# 12 Shahrukh Khan crying to make every audience cry their eyes out. Karan Johar should probably get into some toiletry bussiness, manufacturing Tissue papers to every theatre everytime his movie releases. We need it..!
And heres a market strategy ( for fun of course) : Try and print your face on the tissue papers..You know where we 're gonna use that to "wipe" ass-face..!

# 13 Rohan would discover he has a Nanny called "Ammi-jaan". Most movies of Karan Johar has this character. Dont believe me..? Watch KKHH, K3G, KHNH,MNIK..
Maybe it goes back to K-Jo's mommy issues..And it aint hot..!

# 14 Maybe a hindustani Desh-Bhakti "i modified" song. Remember "Raghupati-Raghav-Raja-Ram","Om-jai-jagadish-hare", "Saare jahan se accha" and "Hum-honge-kaamyaab = We-shall-overcome". Fuck you K-Jo.

# 15 Something about Farida Jalal and Aruna Irani...;P

Crapster is what Karan Johar is..You Faggot..!!

6 comments:

  1. bingo .. as I was reading through I was agreeing with every single point ... Pitru devo bhavam ... lolss ...

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  2. OMG! You got me into splits. Still laughing.

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  3. i do not agree at all.. not all the points i mean...K.Johar has the hots for oldies...(kajol, Rani, Priety) but have you noticed,other than those three anyone who can REALLY act????

    And u got a few facts wrong...there is no Rohan in KKHH...

    And his movies may not be the best for you, but i for one love MUSH...love KKHH, Love SRK...love KAJOL,love LOVE!

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