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this can better be a haiku !! not a story :)
this can be made to a 10 word postdont think that the last sentence was neededthe first 2 lines means eveythingrespite.....
after 400 words contestthe word count r reducing :pnice
i second prats for the same point not a story though :)
if u permit asbah, i want to try re arranging it into haiku .. only if u agree :)
sure biya, haiku, i remember is a three lined poems/verse right?yeah, Definetely not a story, it is..
correctly guessed .. its a 3 lined verse.. thats y i thot of haiku wen i saw this :)
I agree with Stephen ...The last line was Avoidable .....
The last line is added to accentuate the sprouting of grass and yellow flowers, without which the concept of spring is incomplete !
No the last line is needed...The wait of Mother Earth is over. Her dry days are over.. the rains have quenched her thirst.. All is going to be ok now! Rains are here to get rid of the pain..to soothe it and to give new life!Pain is over..New life begins now!
the haiku isnt lovely ... but as per the rules, this will be the haiku :Sun surrenders asheavenly drops kiss the landsYellow flaunt in green.
yeah true, new life begins now :)Biya, wow!
no need for wow :P !! i have just re arranged your words :)
Comments are sexy.
this can better be a haiku !! not a story :)
ReplyDeletethis can be made to a 10 word post
ReplyDeletedont think that the last sentence was needed
the first 2 lines means eveything
respite.....
after 400 words contest
ReplyDeletethe word count r reducing :p
nice
i second prats for the same point
ReplyDeletenot a story though :)
if u permit asbah, i want to try re arranging it into haiku .. only if u agree :)
ReplyDeletesure biya, haiku, i remember is a three lined poems/verse right?
ReplyDeleteyeah, Definetely not a story, it is..
correctly guessed .. its a 3 lined verse.. thats y i thot of haiku wen i saw this :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Stephen ...The last line was Avoidable .....
ReplyDeleteThe last line is added to accentuate the sprouting of grass and yellow flowers, without which the concept of spring is incomplete !
ReplyDeleteNo the last line is needed...The wait of Mother Earth is over. Her dry days are over.. the rains have quenched her thirst.. All is going to be ok now! Rains are here to get rid of the pain..to soothe it and to give new life!
ReplyDeletePain is over..New life begins now!
the haiku isnt lovely ... but as per the rules, this will be the haiku :
ReplyDeleteSun surrenders as
heavenly drops kiss the lands
Yellow flaunt in green.
yeah true, new life begins now :)
ReplyDeleteBiya, wow!
no need for wow :P !! i have just re arranged your words :)
ReplyDelete